It’s 2015!

And I don’t like it very much so far. Humph. This is mainly a housekeeping post. Hello! I haven’t died or anything; life has just been utterly crazy since I got back. However, here I am, at the laptop again, and hopefully soon you will be regaled with stories of dating again. I have a date this week…

I often get asked what happened to the guys I’ve already dated, and also what happens when I like them, how many dates before I stop and say ok time to wrap up the project. I figured this is a good place for short updates.

#1 proved me wrong and did resurface. He floats around in my Facebook, occasionally commenting on things. I’m sure we’ll manage to meet again someday.

#2 is happily working away in his foreign country. We occasionally ping each other on chat to say hi, what’s up. Sadly I have not had the chance to see him again. He is most amused by how popular the blog is, and when I told him how popular he and his post are, he promptly demanded a cut. Ahem.

#3 I saw a couple more times, but I think we were mutually disinterested, and not connecting enough to stay friends, so he faded out.

#4 also lurks on my whatsapp and gchat. We have not managed to meet again, which I guess proves neither of us is motivated enough? I like to think of him as a friendly acquaintance I’m always happy to hear from. Unfortunately I lost my wallet last year, so I also lost the prediction he’d made for my project that I was supposed to open on the 1st. I should ask him what it was…

#5 periodically surfaces, always at highly inconvenient times poor lamb, so I’m always rushing off unable to talk to him. I did invite him to a party but he fell sick and couldn’t come.

#6. Hah. #6 bombarded me with phone calls from cockpits and strings of texts and several ‘I’m likely to be in Delhi; I’ll call you when I land’s, but never actually did. He also threw a hissy fit when I told him I didn’t appreciate the flakiness, citing his work as excuse. I did like him a lot–too much for my own good–so I let him keep me on the hook for longer than I should have. Once I started ignoring him he faded away too, only to resurface to wish me Happy Diwali (!!) at which point I chewed him out for shitty behaviour and he claimed he was in a foreign country which is why he hadn’t been able to talk. He had no response of course when I pointed out that they have internet.

#7 and I have made a few attempts to karaoke again, and he has sent me the occasional text, but he too has faded. I do feel bad–he was sweet. I should text him right now.

#8 was also a great flake. He claimed great interest and was slow to respond. I, in my excitement at having met two interesting guys by that point, was very enthu and that is likely where the problem began, because I think #8 needed to chase. Anyway he flaked god knows how many times, I ignored him, he resurfaced with abject apology explaining that his life was very stressed out with family stuff etc and would I please let him make it up to me. I said okay; he finally committed to a day, saying he’d let me know the plan then, and I have never heard from him again. Never ceases to amaze how badly people behave while dating, and they think it’s okay.

#9 of course I never saw or heard from again.

#10 did text me a lot for a while, and I did invite him to a party that he swore he’d come to, but then he didn’t, and I heard nothing from him till the 31st when I was in the ToI. I think I can safely say there isn’t enough motivation on either side for friendship or anything else.

#11 I saw twice more when he was in town, and he was a charming and breathtakingly hot as the first time. We had a really good time both times–how could we not when they involved the Taj Mansingh! But then he also dropped off, and I think has left the country because his number doesn’t exist any more. Which I am, on balance, quite okay with, since I guess I knew it was unlikely there would be anything serious between us.

#12 again I did not see or hear from again.

#13 was active a lot on whatsapp for a while; we swapped more cat stories. It turns out he also went out with a friend of mine in Bangalore, which freaked her out but doesn’t bother me. He told me he’d be in Delhi in October, but then did the vanish thing, and did not respond to any of my messages after that.

#14 and I were on whatsapp a lot for a while, much banter and flirting, but he was too busy and I got tired of suggesting plans and he said he’s surface when his life calmed down. Which apparently it hasn’t because nary a peep in months.

#15 was so very nice. I really liked him, but I had learned from #6 and #8 so I refused to invest. And despite our fun date, it turned out to have been a wise move, because when I asked about second date he told me that he’d actually, in the month it had taken for us to work out a date, rekindled romance with an old flame. ‘I’d love to hang out as friends though,’ he said, and of course I have never heard from him again.

#16 I saw again; he came to my house for dinner and I fed him south Indian food. And then we had some serious misunderstandings that made me want to run like crazy but then he explained it. Still I’m wary where he’s concerned now, which is immaterial anyway since his phone is dead and he’ll be gone soon. We are in desultory gchat touch.

#17 is still around. He is the kind soul who checked in on JP when I was in Bombay for a friend’s wedding last weekend. I have seen him a couple of times after the date, but he has an infuriating habit of not understanding time. The first two plans we made he missed because he fell asleep. The most recent plan he swore he’d be there at a certain time and an hour later texts to ask if there’s any point in coming. So, while he’s really hot and easygoing and fun to hang out with, I can’t invest in him in any way because he’s a total time flake and nothing drives me crazy quite like that!

#18 I never heard from again.

#19 was in constant touch all through my trip to the US, and turned up at the airport to collect me upon my return. Awwww. He is incredibly sweet and lots of fun and I look forward to spending a lot of time with him, if nothing else because I must add him to my people collection.

And there you have it folks!

Oh, no, wait. I also saw Bombay date when I was in Bombay, and he remains in touch too.

P.S. This is post #80!!! Wow.

39 thoughts on “It’s 2015!

  1. Hey wish you a rocking 2015….and lots of action at all fronts:)
    and a very nice read (above)
    And yes I missed your posts…I though of emailing you but then I was sure, you will pop up again very soon…
    Have a nice day…:)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. One more thing, I wanted to thank you for teaching me and all of us the correct usage of semicolon :)
    I can’t recall the post where you mentioned about this, but I was always floundering in correct rule of semicolon and then I avoided using it at all in my writing English.
    But after that i revisited the rules, learned it and yes it was very simple
    Thanks once again
    I hope I am not sounding funny here…..Just telling you direct dil se :)
    These small things do matter a lot

    Liked by 1 person

    • heh you know i hold that there aren’t 50 guys right? so by the end of june 2015 i’m likely to be proven right. that said there have been far more than i expected, duds included

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      • Yep, but, personally, I didn’t think the situation would actually be this bad when I started following the blog! I think I might start a similar experiment once I am over 30 too, to see if the same holds true for girls as well.

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  3. So, you’ve been meeting the new guys, and parallely meeting the old dates too. Isn’t that sort of two (or n) timing :)

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    • no, because cheating or two-timing is when you’ve made a commitment to not see other people and then do it anyway. not only have i not made any such commitments, i have not asked for them or been asked for them, AND everyone knows what’s going on.

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      • I am amazed at your politeness yet again, Nanny. Some of your readers are such … lovely people. Sheesh.

        (Not to mention, a bit slow on the uptake. Who the fuck says two (or n) timing when you’ve been updating every bloody thing on the blog as and when it happens, including this round-up post? Does continuing to go on new dates not count as whatever timing Mr. Dolon had in mind, or is it only “parallely meeting the old dates” that counts? etc. etc. Ooof too many idiotic inconsistencies. I wish people would *think* before typing.)

        Liked by 1 person

      • hahaha i was thinking as i types this, shil and neelkomol are going to shout at m for being nice again aren’t they…

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      • The best part is when someone leaves a dickish, passive-aggressive comment and then appends a “:)” to the end. As it that makes everything they actually say okay. :)

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      • I don’t know what’s the big deal here guys? I just asked something, didn’t mean to offend anyone. I’m as much a fan of this female here as are you’ll.

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    • Thomas and Nanny, I wasn’t fighting. I don’t know Thomas from Adam, so I only went by what he actually wrote. And yeah, it was rather dickish (and slow on the update, like I also mentioned). Perhaps inadvertently? Whoo knows? I’ve never claimed to be a mindreader :-)

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  4. hi 50datesdelhi – I read about your blog in an article in yahoo originals and got hooked to the idea not necessarily the blog posts describing each date. I have read in parts (which describe in essence the experience of dating strange men -omg that phrase! so daunting) your posts and I think this is brave. Well, I know you will scoff here but no, not brave because ‘oh my god every strange man you meet in Delhi will be a potential assaulter’ but because it is brave – to be willingly vulnerable. Anyway, I read more carefully this post to find out – is there any hope? for me? A 25-year-old in urban Delhi? I don’t want this blog to be responsible for creating any hopes (reliable or imaginary) but god I am giving it a chance (knowing I will most probably be turned off from meeting guys I know are jerks -virtually and real(ly).) PS- Please don’t do this ‘at my age, I s hudnt want a relationship and if I get it, I will be delighted or privileged’ to yourself esp after this experiment.

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    • erm at your age i thought i had failed because i didn’t have a kid, so you won’t get that from me! heh. you’re the best person to decide when you want to find love, but be warned that does not mean you’re right or that you’ll get it.

      the rest of my reply was so long it was nearly a post so i decided ill just write you a post =)

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    • You will know a jerk the minute you see one. There is no need to willingly restrict yourself. It’s called a woman’s instinct.
      Also, in Delhi, unless you go willingly looking for trouble, trouble will not come to you (inspite of anything anyone may say)

      So good luck and venture forth !! Good Luck

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      • “unless you go willingly looking for trouble, trouble will not come to you (inspite of anything anyone may say)” — sounds like the kind of logic that ends in victim-blaming, yo.

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  5. Nannyest, mucho hugs to ring in the new year! I hope it’s a goody–an annus mirabilis as it were, and not a horribilis.

    Loved reading the post, as per usual. You’re as good a writer as evah <3 And yeah, the round-up was useful, because like I told you a buncha times, I keep getting them mixed-up in my wee head :P But it's also sobering, and the data set rather telling so far. I hope you find more people you're excited by, and who don't flake or fade on you, and I hope that beyond the data, you do manage to collect some people that stick around in various capacities :-) But even if nothing else, it's working out very nicely as a social anthropological experiment, so you're bang on target there.

    Did you ever get any responses on the "Indian dating horror/amazing stories" section that had come up as a suggestion? As in, reader-submitted dating stories? Oh, and I am still looking forward to more #Datiquette posts :)

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  6. Brave girl. I hope 2015 brings you much more fun and fewer flakes/entitled douches to deal with. (I love how you organised the dating year and it’s experiences)

    Also, one hopes, a Mumbai trip and a chance to have more experiences like the first. Oh, and if there’s time a coffee date with moi. :-)

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    • thanks! i hope so too heh.
      aaaaaa im beginning to hate bombay trips because its a horrible city to get around and i know too many people there =\

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